spare the rod and spoil the child

English

Medieval schoolboy being birched

Alternative forms

• spare the rod and you will spoil the child

Etymology

Commonly claimed to have come from the King James Version of the Bible, Book of Proverbs, 13:24: “He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes.”

Due to the associated “spoil" concept which is not in the Bible, it more likely came from a 17th-century poem by Samuel Butler called Hudibras. In the poem, a love affair is likened to a child, and spanking is mockingly commended as a way to make the love grow stronger. The actual verse reads:

• “What medicine else can cure the fits
  Of lovers when they lose their wits?
  Love is a boy by poets styled
  Then spare the rod and spoil the child.”

Proverb

spare the rod and spoil the child

1. If one does not discipline a child, the child will never learn obedience and good manners.

Translations

if one does not discipline a child he or she will never learn respect or humility

• Arabic: please add this translation if you can
• Chinese:

  Mandarin: 不打不成器 (bù dǎ bù chéng qì), 省了棍子，慣壞了孩子／省了棍子，惯坏了孩子 (shěng le gùnzi, guànhuài le háizi), 三天不打，上房揭瓦 (sāntiānbùdǎ, shàngfángjiēwǎ)

• Czech: please add this translation if you can
• Danish: den man elsker, tugter man
• Dutch: zachte heelmeesters, stinkende wonden
• Esperanto: amo kaj puno loĝas komune
• Finnish: joka vitsaa säästää, se lastaan vihaa
• French: qui aime bien, châtie bien (fr)
• German: wer mit der Rute spart, verzieht das Kind, wer sein Kind liebt, der schlägt es
• Greek: όποιος αγαπά, τιμωρεί (ópoios agapá, timoreí)

  Ancient Greek: ὃς φείδεται τῆς βακτηρίας μισεῖ τὸν υἱὸν αὐτοῦ, ὁ δὲ ἀγαπῶν ἐπιμελῶς παιδεύει (hòs pheídetai tês baktērías miseî tòn huiòn autoû, ho dè agapôn epimelôs paideúei)

• Hebrew: חָסַךְ שבטו שׂוֹנֵא בְּנוֹ (khásakh [?] soné b'no)
• Hungarian: néha jól jön egy jól irányzott pofon, elkel néha egy jól irányzott pofon
• Italian: chi ama bene, castiga bene
• Japanese: 可愛い子には旅をさせよ (ja) (kawaii ko ni wa tabi o sase yo), 獅子の子落とし (ja) (ししのこおとし, shishi no ko otoshi)
• Latin: quī bene amat, bene castīgat
• Polish: kto dobrze kocha, ten tęgo bije, dzieci trzeba trzymać krótko, kto się lubi ten się czubi
• Portuguese: quem ama, castiga
• Russian: пожале́ешь ро́згу — испо́ртишь ребёнка (požaléješʹ rózgu — ispórtišʹ rebjónka), кого́ люблю́ — того́ и бью (kovó ljubljú — tovó i bʹju)
• Spanish: escatima el palo y malcría al hijo, quien bien te quiere, te hará llorar, la letra con sangre entra
• Swedish: den man älskar, agar man, aga din son medan han är liten, annars agar han dig när han blir stor
• Telugu: మొక్కై వంగనిది మానై వంగున (mokkai vaṅganidi mānai vaṅguna)
• Turkish: insan sevdiğine takılırmış
• Vietnamese: please add this translation if you can

See also

• give him enough rope and he'll hang himself
• Orbilian